From "Haha!" to "WHO IS ABBY?!?!" (The Way My Mind Works, Ladies and Gentlemen)

Does anyone out there occasionally read the "Dear Abby" column in the newspaper? Because I have a confession to make... I do. And let me tell you why: some of the things people write to her about are absolutely hilarious! I mean, seriously guys, some of these people must live under rocks!

The first one I ever read (that lead to the continuation of my reading them) is probably the best of them all. A man writes to Abby and says:

"Dear Abby, I am in love with my niece. She and I are not related by blood, and I am only 10 years older than her. We have gone on one or two dates, but she has told me that she is uncomfortable being romantically involved with me because of our age difference and the fact that I was married to her aunt. I really like her. What do I do?"

Please excuse me while I go THROW UP. Isn't this guy absolutely crazy??? But my favorite part was Abby's response:

"Dear creeper, If you really like your niece, you will respect her reasonable excuse for not wanting to date you and leave her alone."

Okay, so she didn't really call him a creeper straight out, but that's what she meant. It was so funny.

So now that I have shared my personal favorite "Dear Abby" story, do you see why I read them from time to time? It's just too good to pass up :P

Hmm... Okay so this idea totally just popped into my head... Has anyone ever wondered why the advice columns in newspapers are always called "Dear Abby"? CUZ I JUST DID. I googled it and came up with a reasonable explanation . But that wasn't enough. Ya know, how are we supposed to know who's behind the oh-so-innocent pen name "Abby"... I mean, think about it guys! Abby might not even be a girl! She could be some fat, bearded man who is just as creepy as the guy aforementioned! Abby could be ANYONE! Heck, Abby could be my grandmother and I'd never know!

I think I'm over thinking this... Sorry guys. Expect another post for my complete investigation, haha.